Individuals

So many things remind me of him and the past. Never realized how much of the things in my life I associated it with him. Songs I listened to while talking to him, videos on his blog dedicated to my sister, places visited with him, chocolate he bought for me, jobs I had while he was still by me, things I ate that he took from my share, buses we took, things seen, topics talked about, concerts attended.

I can't tell if I miss him or the memories because I cannot imagine being with him anymore. Things changed too much. Seemed as if it's too long since we last met, when it has only been three weeks or so.

I'm gradually healing. I know because I can feel it. But healing does not mean that I don't care for him. Maybe in a different way and not as much as last time.

Always a maybe, never a certainty. That's how I advise my friends who needs advising/comes to me for advice.

Friends tell me things like forget him, he's not worth it, he's not your type, he's just an ordinary person. To me he is not and nobody will understand how I feel towards and about him unless you are me. Don't tell me what to think or do because it all doesn't matter. Sometimes we don't need a directive hand down a certain path. Sometimes all we need is a few uncertainties, a little bit of reasoning, a patient listening ear, no drawing of general conclusions, listening to the heart and the mind at the same time, not letting others impose on you their ideas and ultimately letting nature take its own course.

Because not everybody fits into a category. Every person who has dumped a person is an individual on his/her own and the person always have their own reasons for doing what he/she did, whether or not we know or understand.

Maybe all we need to do is to understand those who are hurt. Understand not with your ears and mind but with your heart. I find that the most effective way of listening to somebody spilling their problems.