almost 2007

It's almost 2007, he said he'll be back then. Do I think I'll see a new entry tomorrow? I don't know. Probably not. Sigh.

Last few hours of 2006, though! =) Enjoy yourselves, everybody!

Every second pass is a second closer to his next post, so... till then. *shrug* Nah, it ain't anything much to me.

come back quick

I want him to come back quickly and blog. It's boring without his entries.

CORS 2

Oh alright, I miss him. I really thought by doing this CORS thing for him, it'd be the only chance we can talk at all.

CORS bidding

He SMSed me this morning, the first in such a long while, asking for help in CORS. I said ok and he explained that he will be away during the CORS period and need somebody to help him bid. I really wanted to help him, but I realized that I'm working as well during that period and would need somebody else to help me bid. I tried asking for leave from Damien, but the timings were just odd and it was quite a hassle so I just gave it up and told SH that I can't help him, he would have to find somebody else.

Damn, what a waste.

cold

He mentioned on his blog that he was going on an expedition, so as a friend and out of curiosity I left a comment asking where he was going and how long would it be, but he said he couldn't tell me now. So today in the midst of another comment I asked again if he's expedition was over and he replied with a single yes. Cold, curt. I can't help feeling a bit hurt because if it were others that would not simply be just the reply. Does he really want me to go away and disappear? It hurts, really hurt that he's replying curtly. I keep telling myself that maybe I'm reading it wrong, that he doesn't mean it curtly that he does this to everybody else, but I know that is not the truth. I keep forgetting why things are like this. I'm trying to keep everything normal, as normal as possible, really, as well as to remember that I can't expect him to talk to me normally, but I didn't expect it to be so difficult.

Days spent dreaming of him, of the time spent with him. At least that is something that can't be taken away from me - the smile upon my lips and the warmth from within at the thought of those days.

Highly likely

It is highly likely that he is doesn't read my blog anymore. It is highly likely that he is purposely avoiding it. It is also highly likely that he doesn't harbour anymore feelings for me. In fact it is highly likely that he dislikes me greatly and is trying to chase me away. Yet I still like him. I like him a lot, really a lot. It is also highly likely that my affection towards him has caused us to become what we are today. The past is always sweet, the present is always confused, the future always unknown... and alone.

His last paper just ended

And he finishes his last paper at 7pm! Congrats!
Alright, this is a bit dumb. Hehz. Hopefully he'll do well this semester and in the meanwhile hope he'll have fun.

Please

Please don't let him hate me. Please don't let him hate me. Please don't let him hate me.